November 10, 2005, Thursday: 9:30pm

About the Nielsen ratings

I just finished a week of being part of a Nielsen family and filling out a Nielsen ratings diary. I missed most of the TV shows because I spent the time trying to fill out the diary. Finally I just started watching a lot less TV.

September 13, 2005, Tuesday

About CNN's Breaking News

A couple of days ago, I get a CNN Breaking News item in my inbox. I'm subbed to it, and it can be handy. On 9-11 when no one could get through to the overloaded news sites, I still got the breaking news which I could forward out to everyone. But this one I got the other day -- remember, this is Breaking News -- it says, "e coli found in the New Orleans flood waters." I was stunned. The sewers are open and somehow e coli got in the water? Shocking. Now, if they said they didn't find ANY e coli in the water, that would have been some news. "We've tested all this flood water, and we can't find one tiny bit of e coli in it." That's breaking news.

September 2, 2005

About extra large rolls of toilet paper

How lazy is someone who just can't muster up the energy to change a roll of toilet paper and has to install an extender to hold an extra large roll? Do they just sit on the toilet all day, using toilet paper? Is it really that difficult to pop out the holder and drop that cardboard tube in the trash?

About Fairly Odd Parents

This cartoon's OK, but that poor kid is abused. Timmy is used as a footstool by his parents, and they clean the gutters with his face before they leave him with the murderous high school babysitter to go out and party. Instead of calling those fairy godparents, he should call Social Services.

About the warning sign on the vending machine at work

I don't understand why the stick figure warning implies that you shouldn't do one-armed pushups while holding the vending machine or lightning bolts will strike you in your head. And while I'm on the subject of vending machines, could it really be too much to put a little piece of foam or something in the bottom of the machine so the Butterfingers and peanut M&Ms aren't all smashed to hell when they hit?

August 19, 2005, Friday

About strangers showing up at my house

If someone has moved out into the country, out into the woods, away from society, it probably means they don't want strangers just showing up at their house. This girl shows up at my house; she's got some gig going where someone (presumably not her) will clean a carpet of mine for free, and she might get to go to New Orleans if she gets the most carpets cleaned. Something to that effect. I had food on the stove, Terry napping, Benjamin running around in his underwear covered in mud, a cigarette burning in the ashtray while I tried to head her off to keep her out of my personal space. And the first thing I see is this folder she has covered in pictures of New Orleans, and she's talking up New Orleans like I'm going to get to go there. Then I find out SHE wants to go there. For free. Well, she should just drive on down. It's not that far from here.

July 31, 2005

About Pinatas

I don't even understand Pinatas. I'm sure there's some tradition, some Mexican ceremonial thing, some sort of symbolism. But what it amounts to now is that you buy a big fuzzy papier mache character for your kid's birthday party, some character they love like Spongebob or Winnie the Pooh or Thomas the Tank Engine and then you get the kids to beat the hell out of it. Doesn't this tell the kids, if you like something, beat it with a stick? Shouldn't pinatas be made out of something that they DON'T like? Like liver and onions or a big toothbrush. Why don't we just get effigy burning dolls for party entertainment? Terrorists, heads of state, the kid at school that nobody likes.

July 22, 2005, Friday

About Bob Dylan, Robert Plant, and the Doodlebops

I'm reading Bob's autobiography; after about three months, the library finally e-mailed me that I was up on the reserve list. It's great! Any reviewer who didn't like it is full of shit and just looking for something to get pissy about. It reads like he just wants to try to answer the questions that he's been asked all these years, what inspires him, what influenced his music, how he came up with his name. It appears that he leaves out some chunks, but that's his perogative; besides, he can't write everything. Anyway, what's that quote about the meaning of things not said? Sometimes what's not said is more important than what is. Just saw Robert Plant on the Tonight Show. Damn! He's looking like that old Scottish actor, Billy whatshisname. His voice has changed, too; it's still good, but it lost that Thing. Now, about the Doodlebops; yeah, they are creepier than Thomas the Tank Engine. What's with the wigs? I guess what creeps me out about the Doodlebops (and Lazy Town) is that they're grownups wearing bizarre outfits and jumping around and trying to act like little kids. Why don't they just get some little kids to be in these shows? Or let grownups be grownups like Mr. Rogers or Captain Kangaroo or those folks on Sesame Street? Mr. Rogers never wore a wig or rolled around on the floor.

June 13, 2005

About Trains

I'll be honest; Thomas the Tank Engine creeps me out. In the same way I get creeped out by Yellow Submarine and Chicken Run and, to some extent, the Teletubbies. Sargeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band creeped me out, too, but that's a whole other story. They're like those bad dreams where nothing bad has actually happened, but you have that eerie feeling. Who needs that? Tim Burton stuff is kind of like that also.

May 3, 2005

About Memphis in May

Big party, man, HUGE.

December 3, 2004

About Christmas Music

So, they redid the Band Aid Do They Know It's Christmas? song. (Here's a news article about it with lyrics and another at Yahoo.) It's nice and all that they want to send money to the starving Africans, but I was glad to see that at least somebody, the World Development Movement in this case, point out that the song is "patronising, false and out of date" and depicts "negative stereotypes". Whatever. My first problem with the song is the title. Do they know it's Christmas? Since less than half of Africa is Christian and the ones that are celebrate Christmas in January, odds are good that they don't know it's Christmas when we think it's Christmas and probably don't care. Maybe a song called "Do They Know It's Ramadan?" or "Do They Know It's Kwanzaa?" would be more appropriate. But I think what gets to me more is the line, " And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time." Well, thank God! Wouldn't that just be a bitch on top of everything else. You're starving and homeless, the last thing you need is a hard freeze. Snow in Africa would probably kill more people than starvation.

November 22, 2004

About Passion of the Christ and Kill Bill

Jesus! These are brutal movies! I have to rate Kill Bill a little higher on the brutality scale since a lot more people died and in a greater variety of ways. Of course, I'm looking at both volumes (which should have just been one movie). But, Passion rates higher on the depression scale because you know all those people in Kill Bill deserved what they got. Took me about four days to watch Passion. Mel should have gotten Val Kilmer to play Jesus. He did a great Jim Morrison and Jim and Jesus were a lot alike. I went over to the IMDB and looked up the actors. Did Mel feel that previous vampire experience was needed for the parts? The guy that played Jesus also played the junkie in Pay It Forward. Made a good junkie, not such a good Jesus.

November 6, 2004

I started an online journal some time ago. Here is a link to it: Darla Kay's previous Journal. It also has info about me.

What's New on DK's Site

I have new pictures of Benjamin up, pictures from our trip to Texas and pictures from Hallowe'en.
I also have up some new spider pictures. I haven't linked in the page yet, but I love these pictures. It is an Araneus, but she looks different from all the others I've seen. She is orange and yellow instead of brown.

About the Election

Well, it just sucked, didn't it? Yeah, I voted. I regret it. I felt sick afterwards, long before any results were in. I was a fraud. I will never vote again.

About Passion of the Christ and Wonderland

I've seen an hour and 11 minutes of Passion of the Christ. I don't know. I don't mind the subtitles. I like to watch everything with the subtitles on anyway. So, it's pretty gruesome. I don't see it converting anyone or making anyone feel closer to God or anything like that. And the guy playing Jesus really isn't Jesusy enough for me. Mel Gibson should have just played Jesus himself. If you want to see a good, depressing movie, watch Wonderland. It has Val Kilmer as John Holmes and it's the true stories about the Wonderland murders. It's very disturbing, but very well done.

About the Mall